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Caffeine Etiquette

by Tom Nickeas on Thursday, July 21, 2016

Common Ventures recently welcomed a new addition to the team, Norma the percolator, and like her Double R Diner namesake, she serves up fresh cups of good, hot, black coffee. As anyone in the creative industry knows, coffee flows thick through the veins of every agency, and the Common office is no exception. More than just a solid hit of caffeine, fresh pots are an experience, a workplace ritual that unifies colleagues in a shared happiness.

Norma Bean, the Common Ventures Percolator

The trendier, more attractive cousin of the water cooler?—?the coffee pot has a magic to it that sparks conversation and brings out the best in any within aromatic range, washing away the pixels from the corners of many a tired eye and energizing the kind-mannered beast within. Whatever differences people have, be it deadline-fuelled rage or “purple looks better you f*#king burke”, a fresh, hot cup of joe brings everyone back together.

The cornerstone of this polite re-awakening is, of course, solid glass jug etiquette; the few rules that, while optional, ensure cheer is brought to the lives of many a fatigued creative. Smiles all round.

Here are some rhymtastic tips for staying classy at coffee time:

FIRST THROUGH THE DOOR, BREWS IT FOR ALL
Those first few steps over the threshold into a new workday can be tough; an instant greeting of fresh coffee in the air could be the difference between Spree Killer Dan, or Just Dan. If you’re the lucky one who gets to unlock that door and switch on the lights to a brand new Monday, make sure you get that liquid lifesaver going as well, or else.

IF YOU KILL THE JOE, MAKE SOME MO’
If you kill it, make sure you refill it. Plain and simple.

WHILE COFFEE IS HOT, SPOILERS ARE NOT
This one should just be common sense. Inevitably someone’s died, on some show, sometime in the last week, these things happen. Refraining from displays of extreme disappointment/elation, followed by overly enthusiastic analysis of plot lines is the mark of an A-grade colleague. The kitchen at caffeine o’clock is a hot pot of activity, some of it unaware of the recent happenings in HBO land, so be a legend and make sure you’re in a safe place before crying about that person who did that thing.

GET FOR YOU, GET FOR A FEW
Admit it, those two grab mitts on the end of your agency-nurtured forearms were never going to make it to a Cartier fashion shoot. Stop being precious and slam those fingers round some steaming hot mugs, time to share the love.

About the Author

Tom is a picture sorta guy, doing picture sorta things at a creative sorta agency called Common Ventures. Occasionally he does wordy sorta things, they’re ok.